I have felt every one of these words sometime in the past few months. It bothers me that I am feeling these things and have been wrestling with how to stop feeling these ways. They come and go, but when I am feeling them it's like a cyclone where I can't get away from feeling that way.
I have been trying to watch a podcast or two a day to help keep my mind and heart on Jesus and to avoid any of these negative feelings as it is a constant struggle living in a foreign country like Romania. It has become my new ritual, so to speak, to watch these podcasts. It's been great for me. I feel like the Lord is revealing a lot to me through the scriptures, teachings, and additional time I spend with the Lord. So today, I was watching a podcast on The Poison of Bitterness. And was it GOOD!
My first reaction was, okay yeah people become bitter. I didn't think much of it. But to my surprise I realized bitterness has been at the root of all these feelings I have been experiencing while over here in Romania. Bitterness isn't something that is discussed much and so it was great to watch a sermon on it. It is because bitterness is hidden within you-below the surface. It isn't something that is easily seen until it's too late and you explode from all the build up. Anyhow, I would recommend you to take some time to watch the podcast as it was a great teaching. Please check it out here.
So I realized the Poison of Bitterness lays at the root of our inability to forgive and press on. Side note: Press on is part of an expression I heard once. Someone said "nail it to the cross and press on." This was referring to Jesus being nailed to the cross (our sins) so we could press on (accept His grace and move forward).
Our anger or frustrations are the beginning, then when we can't forgive it hides inside us festering, never forgetting. This is when seeds are planted and take root in bitterness and wont let go. They root in you, unable to let it go. This bitterness you hold can affect your whole life and the lives of others. You project your feelings on others, you replay the events over and over again becoming obsessed with what happened, and you become suspicious of everyone-waiting for them to hurt you or do the same.
When you become bitter, you leave no room for God to do work in your life because you have built walls to protect yourself from being hurt again. You can not be up rooted and change the way the Lord has planned for you. You are stuck in an eddy unable to move.
How do we get out of these Eddies?
"See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many" ~Hebrews 12:15We are to strive for unity and peace rom the fruits of the spirit. These fruits of the spirit are: "love, joy, holiness, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self control, peacefulness" (Galatians 5:22-26). We can fight our fleshly desires with the fruits of the spirit. Practice these fruits to combat the works of our flesh. It is with the Holy Spirit working in our hearts that we are able to change our hearts and reap the benefits of the fruits.
"Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. Be of the same mind towards one another.Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion." ~Romans 12:14-16We need to love our enemies. It's easy to love those like us and those we really love, but how do we love our enemies and those who continuously hurt us? It's hard, and I by no means have figured out the key because I am constantly hurt by others and have to accept God's grace to forgive the people who hurt me. I struggle and it takes time but I find freedom once I have truly forgiven them and can move on. Win them back with kindness, forgiveness, and holiness.
We are not to avenge for ourselves or take matters into our own hands to find justice. For it is written in Romans 12:17-21 that it is the Lord's job to judge and avenge. So I need to let go of that need for control and power, and surrender it to the Lord. Let Him take care of it.
How do we Kill Bitterness?
Once we realize that it only matters how Jesus sees us, we can accept the grace that has been given to us. In bitterness we are appealing to our own righteousness and justifying ourselves. By doing so, we are turing our backs on God. Jesus made us His treasure. He is always there searching for a door to come in and take us away to protect us. We just have to recognize when He is knocking and let Him in. When it seems hard, look at the cross he died upon. He did that for us! So that we could "nail our bitterness to the cross, and press on." So we could put the bitterness behind us and move to better emotions such as those fruits of the Spirit.
I know it sounds easy, but it's not. As I write this I am thinking. Okay great I just need to forgive and accept the Lord's forgiveness. You can say it, but until you really believe it and accept it in your heart, it isn't true. So I am in the process of letting go and trying to press on. I hope you can too, it's a process but we are all in it together! So ask for help and search out friends or community to help you get through it. Encouragement and support makes a huge difference to truly forgiving and accepting the Lord's Grace.
